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By her own reckoning, Janet had realized that she would have to learn to navigate by her own internal compass with no help or guidance from me. She was dedicated to learning how to do that and I was committed to helping her.If it accomplished anything, the time that we had agreed to separate built an emotional firebreak between our past marriage and our prospective one. And I was hoping that when I picked up my life again with her, which I fully intended to do, we would recapture some of the freshness that we had lost over time.But I had to admit that I was having serious buyer’s remorse about the living in exile part of our arrangement. Five weeks into the mission, it hurt a lot to wake up without her next to me. That sense of loss overcame any disagreeable feelings about the week she spent with Murphy. In fact, those old unpleasant memories were replaced by new, even more disturbing ones. I was constantly wondering what she was doing in the times that I wasn’t around.We had weekly. The covers had moved down her body to expose her back. I get closer and run my fingers slowly over her skin. My touches were light so I didn't wake her. An avalanche of emotions fall over me and my heart flutters in my chest. "I love you."I whisper softly then smile. I quickly check to see if Kelly is awake and sigh when I see she is still soundly asleep. I look at the clock and see that my parents will already be home in a few minutes. Shit. I get out of bed quietly and run through the house to gather my clothes. I get dressed and leave a note on the pillow next to Kelly; Dear Kelly, Today was not one of our scheduled days so my parents have beaten me home. I had to leave quickly. I'll see you tomorrow and I hope to see you wearing one of those really hot skirts. Xoxox, Emily//I don't have time to react.Red lips were pressing insistently against mine. Teeth were scraping across the skin of my neck.My head was spinning like I couldn't think or focus.My chest was heaving.
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